I hate it when I find myself here.
I despise it
this walk in shame
an orphan who resists the attachment
Hurling into the cavern of doubt
I know who my Papa is, I know he calls me daughter and yet...
I still cling to my roots of fear
Deserving of no good gift myself.
I spew hate and judgement in my mind like a venom that cuts and wounds my heart and clears the relationship to the ground.
Pray that you fall freely on me tonight.
I long for the touch of truth that rushes hope to me.
The dreams I suppress, hopes and dreams you give yet I push away in rejection of things that may cause uncertainty,
the hope that can twirl like a little girl in a great dress...
Grateful, for the chance.
Thankful that it's not a feeling
It's just an unabashed truth...